Thursday 15 December 2016

Lamborghini-badged iXOOST speaker system achieves new levels of crassness.

You can now buy something that looks like Johnny Five got crazy one night and procreated in union with a '90s Panasonic boom-box. The iXOOST ESAVOX sound system is the overwhelmingly vulgar creation of Matteo Panini's company, which apparently took two years to get the design to this unfathomably garish production state.

Fortunately, those of limited means will be spared the temptation to befoul their homes with an ESAVOX of their own, because it costs twenty thousand Euros. 

Still tempted? You really should have a word with yourself. Still, there's more info after the Jump just for larks.

Available in several colours, including a more subtle black that allows the profound ugliness of the ESAVOX to shine through, the shock absorbers, carbon-fibre chassis and aerodynamic diffuser will probably do little to enhance sound quality, although 800 watts of power will probably make it very loud.

That said, there's no confirmation as to whether those are real watts like in, you know, actual hi-fi equipment, or the kind of hilariously overstated PMPO watts you get from an Alba midi-system or a 'bass cannon' as found in the boot of a Vauxhall Nova. See 1998 for details.

Claimed to be "...something really unique, where design and construction quality are combined in celebration of the Lamborghini legend”, if Ferruccio Lamborghini wasn't already dead, this might conceivably have pushed him over the edge.

Priced at €19,900, oh, plus VAT, Wayne Rooney has allegedly already ordered his, as has every other premier league football player. Except those who play for Middlesbrough, who are getting Minidisc players instead

(Thanks to for the news.)